Team Walt? Really?

[Content note: abuse, violence, misogyny, spoilers for Breaking Bad's 9/15/13 episode, "Ozymandias"]

[Image text: the knife block and the phone from the White's house.]

So Breaking Bad...if you are caught up at all, I assume you found the most recent episode as intense and heavy as I did. In fact, I think my heart rate just now came back down to normal. Wow.

I'm writing this with an intended audience that is both familiar with the show and totally caught up, so again, I'd like emphasize the spoiler warning. Bail out now.

Chicks on the Right...You're So Wrong

As I've mentioned a million times, I'm originally from Indiana. Today one of my Indy friends, Jess, passed along the latest export (in a long line) of things from home that makes me want to cry: Chicks on the Right. They are "Daisy" and "Mockarena":

Daisy is Amy Jo Clark, and Mockarena is Miriam Weaver. Together they write the Chicks on the Right blog (www.chicksontheright.com) and host a talk show on WIBC-FM (93.1) in Indianapolis.

UGH.

I don't even know where to begin. I guess I can start by letting them talk for themselves. Here are a few of the endearing things they have to say:

A Few Thoughts and Links on Orange is the New Black

[Image text: the Orange is the New Black cast]

Ok, I'll be honest...my favorite new show of the year is by far Orange is the New Black and I feel remiss not mentioning that at all. Like so many other people this summer, I consumed the series in two days and was left wanting more. Here's something that nicely summarizes all my recent interactions with donors and board members at work:

[Image description comic of two people talking. Person 1 "How's your summer been?" Person 2 "Great! I've been traveling Europe all month and now I'm back to work. You?" Person 1 "Have..have you seen Orange is the New Black?"]

I haven't written about the show yet because while it deals with so many feminist relevant topics, I feel under qualified to speak about many of them at length (race, queerness, and the prison system, specifically). All I know is that I was so thoroughly pulled in by the show because of the ensemble--the sheer diversity of women (many you never see on TV,) the experiences displayed, and the relationships explored. And it's so damn delightfully woman-centric, created, written, and starring.

Honestly--I could take or leave Piper (the main character.)  I can see how she pushes the story line forward and serves as the character we're supposed to relate to (because she so unexpectedly found herself in prison and I guess we're all supposed to feel like that could be us...?) but it's much more the women around her who have pulled me in and kept me chain watching it all. It has that beautifully perfect mixture of comedy and drama that basically intoxicated me into a delightful trance.

Is it clear that I love it?

Overall, I know the show is not perfect. But it certainly is doing things that are rare and wonderful and at the very least starts some good, feminist discussions. So in that way, I heartily recommend it to anyone who wants an enjoyable and though provoking new series to dig into. I wanted to do some reading about what others are saying about the show and here are some pieces that I find interesting (although I don't co-sign everything written:)

Why ‘Orange Is the New Black’ Is So Addictive 

An In-Depth Look at How "Orange Is the New Black" Compares to Real Life

Prison Bitch is the New Black

New Netflix Show "Orange is the New Black" is a Complex Look at Sex, Gender, and Prison

“Orange Is The New Black”: Taking Privilege to Task

Q&A: Jenji Kohan on nudity, racism and homosexuality in Orange is the New Black



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Going Beyond the Bechdel Test

If you've read just a few of my film analyses, you might have noticed that I rarely discuss the Bechdel Test, and when I do, it's just a passing statement or two. It's not that I've forgotten; it's because I think that the Bechdel Test isn't that interesting when it comes to the overall gender portrayal in films. But I frequently receive emails and messages asking if the films I've written about pass it or mentioning that a movie did or didn't pass. Since it seems to be so important so so many people, I'd like to explain why I feel we need to move past Bechdel.




Let me back, up. I think that the Bechdel Test is an important concept to consider. It points out how sadly rare it is for movies to have two named female characters who talk to each other about something other than a man. But I take two main issues with this criteria being used as short hand for a "feminist film."

1) There overall gender elements of a text that are more important than Brechdel.
When Bechdel is used as the bare minimum for a movie to be viewed as not totally sexist, fine. But I don't think it makes sense to place undue emphasis on Bechdel. For example, in my recent Pacific Rim analysis, as I mentioned, there was a very strong female character who played a critical role in the action of the story. But it doesn't pass Bechdel. So should a movie that passes Bechdel but relegates the women to minor side characters be seen as "more feminist" than Pacific Rim? I'd argue not. As with everything, it is so much more important to view the overall messages, themes, and the full picture than to tick off boxes to pass Bechdel. Otherwise, you're just treading into tokenism and pandering. Which leads me directly to my next point...

2) Bechdel can be abused as an easy out for filmmakers to think they've done something progressive when they actually haven't.
Because my partner is a filmmaker, I know a lot of men who make independent films. As such, I have literally heard and read situations where a few of them have said things like, "Oh let's make sure we give that character a name so that this movie passes the Bechdel Test." I'm not kidding. Because Bechdel is pretty well known at this point, it is effecting male screenwriters. But the net result is not positive when Brechdel is simply pandered to. Like I said above, it is so much more important for films to contain strong and authentic female characters who directly contribute to the action of the film, than it is for Brechdel to be met. I want men to examine how their privilege and their experiences have colored their work and really think about what they create.

So, sorry...you don't get a cookie because you wrote in a 2 second scene where two women speak.

Now, I'm hardly the first person to point these things out and note flaws in Bechdel. But I think it's important that I lay out why I often overlook this issue in my analyses. It's not a mistake...it's often a decision I make. I want to de-emphasize this test.

I don't like things that feel like simplistic reductions of big concepts and the way that The Bechdel Test is applied often falls into this category. I want to encourage actual analysis and thoughtful discussion. Again, I'm not saying we should abandon Bechdel because it does start very important dissections of the media texts before us. But we cannot and should not stop at Bechdel nor give it too much weight.

There is no easy short cut to making more feminist films.


Please see the commenting policy before replying to this post.

In Which I Defend a Miss USA Contestant

Yes, that's right, this is happening.

As you've probably seen (everywhere) Miss Utah, Marissa Powell, offered a less than eloquent response to a question on the wage gap and female heads of households at the 2013 Miss USA pageant.


[Transcript of her answer below the cut]

Far be it from me to think that Miss USA contestants and the pageant world are beyond criticism. But when this type of response (nothing offensive or controversial, just a really garbled answer) goes viral after the pageant, I can't help but feel for the woman.

As Linda Holmes said in a "slight defense" of Powell, these questions aren't designed to get at really hard hitting thoughts or views. They're about looking calm under pressure.

...the last thing I'd use to guess at whether she's smart is whether she can answer this kind of question "correctly." Because "correctly" here just means smoothly, expertly, without hesitation or stammering. Had she said, "What it says is that we live in the greatest country in the world, and every day I get up and thank my lucky stars that I live in the United States of America," she would not be in the news, despite having given just as irrelevant a non-answer. Had she said, "What it says is that family is the most important thing in the world, and we need to figure out how to help all families be happy families because it's the most important thing in the world," she would not be in the news.

But beyond this, what is our collective fascination with watching pageant contestants crash and burn? Why do so many people take so much joy in laughing and ridiculing women like Powell when they can't produce a coherent answer to a really strange and ass backwards question?

I suspect that the short answer is: misogyny. I mean, if the Twittersphere is indicative of trends in public opinion, there's definitely a level of, "haha stupid pageant queen is only good for her looks!" It's classic bullying and people seem to be getting high on the idea that in some way they are better than Powell. (As if they've faced the same situation.)

I know that as a feminist this is where I'm supposed to stand firm in my principles against pageantry and make some statements about the dangers of reducing of women to their looks and the promotion of a very narrow, specific beauty ideal. And trust me, I do hold those feelings.

But ultimately, right now, I'm feeling more sympathy for this one particular woman than I am rage at pageants. I'm just perturbed that society has created these systems which put women on display, hold them up for public scrutiny/admiration/ogling, considers them frivolous, and then openly mocks them when they are frivolous. Where the hell is there a comparable system for men? Rather than scorn Powell and women like her for their participation in this; I scorn the patriarchy for creating it.

Marissa Powell isn't running for office or in charge of a fortune 500 company. She's the current reigning Miss Utah. Let her be.

Gender, Race, and Star Trek

This is a guest post by Sarah, who blogs at Radical Madre. It was reposted with permission. I wanted to feature her thoughts as a compliment to my own recent post on the new Star Trek film. Welcome, Sarah! --A. Lynn

Recently I’ve started watching Star Trek the original series on Netflix. One of the first things I noticed when I was watching it was the fact that there is an impressing representation of men and women (i.e. at least 1 woman to every 3 or 4 men) with the women playing supporting roles on the show. The cast is also pretty racially diverse with characters like Uhura and Sulu playing a predominant role.

Selena Gomez's Come and Get It...FAIL

When I was in Indy this past weekend, I was without my precious satellite radio, and therefore had to listen to the local top 40 station. One of the tunes they kept playing over and over was Selena Gomez's latest, "Come and Get It."

It's one of those songs that serves to be like a virus in my brain and although there's nothing I "like" about it, I found myself absentmindedly humming the chorus today and I decided to check out what the actual lyrics are about...so here you have it:

That's Soooo LA

This is a guest post by Mackenzie Busch, who blogs regularly at Fetus Frolic. 

Awhile back this video was released:

...entitled, “Women of LA” and it is chock-full of every -ism and phobia you can fit into five minutes. A little fat-shaming, gold digging references, racism, homophobia, and gross generalizations of women based solely on their geographic location. They even have a clever line about being unable to get a woman drunk enough to sleep with them, but in the their defense you can’t have misogyny without a little rape culture thrown in, right?  Toss in a few B-List celebrities and you’ve garnered 1 million + views of your unsubstantiated male opinions. 

A Little Dose of Feminist Happiness

I think we can all agree that the past week has been a pretty tough one here in the states. So I thought it might be a nice moment to highlight some of the feminist victories and inspiring stories that have also been taking place:

First, Zimbabweans have approved a constitution that includes gender equality as a principal of the nation. From UN Women:

The draft Constitution approved by referendum opens with provisions stating that respect for gender equality is one of the country’s Founding Values. The Declaration of Rights includes a section on women’s rights, has been expanded to include socioeconomic and cultural rights, and it could be used in legal or judicial proceedings. This means new opportunities for women in jobs, education, finance and credit must be ensured by the government and in national funding.

TIME Magazine has released its list of the 100 most influential people and 15 year old Pakistani Malala Yousafzai is on the cover. As they said at TIME:

The Taliban almost made Malala a martyr; they succeeded in making her a symbol. The memoir she is writing to raise awareness about the 61 million children around the world who are not in school indicates she accepts that unasked-for responsibility as a synonym for courage and a champion for girls everywhere. However Malala concludes her book, her story so far is only just beginning. 

And finally, from West Virginia, we have Katelyn Campbell who protested her schools slut-shamey abstinence focused assembly. As reported at Think Progress,

George Washington High School recently hosted a conservative speaker, Pam Stenzel, who travels around the country to advocate an abstinence-only approach to teen sexuality. Stenzel has a long history of using inflammatory rhetoric to convince young people that they will face dire consequences for becoming sexually active. At GW’s assembly, Stenzel allegedly told students that “if you take birth control, your mother probably hates you” and “I could look at any one of you in the eyes right now and tell if you’re going to be promiscuous.” She also asserted that condoms aren’t safe, and every instance of sexual contact will lead to a sexually transmitted infection.

[Katelyn] Campbell refused to attend the assembly, which was funded by a conservative religious organization called “Believe in West Virginia” and advertised with fliers that proclaimed “God’s plan for sexual purity.” Instead, she filed a complaint with the ACLU and began to speak out about her objections to this type of school-sponsored event. Campbell called Stenzel’s presentation “slut shaming” and said that it made many students uncomfortable.

When the news is flooded with images of violence, racism, and oppression, as it often is, it can be hard to see the small victories taking place each day, all over the world. But the truth is that there is always much to be happy for--it's just that when profit and ratings are your motivation, the happy stories take a back seat to fear. It's important to be informed but it's becoming increasingly clear to me that the major news networks are not able to present information in a way which is not also disgustingly sensationalized. (I know that this is not a revolutionary realization.) I'm finding that news consumption is much more manageable for me when I choose how, when, and from whom I receive updates. That way I can also get the good with the bad and feel much less burned out.

Anyway, here's hoping for a less "eventful" week ahead of us.

This blog has strict comment moderation intended to preserve a safe space. Moderation is managed solely by the blog author. As such, even comments made in good faith will be on a short delay, so please do not attempt to resubmit your comment if it does not immediately appear. Discussion and thoughtful participation are encouraged, but abusive comments of any type will never be published. The blog author reserves the right to publish/delete any comments for any reason, at her sole discretion. 

Simpsons Tapped Out and the Case of the Missing Women

Let it never be said that I am person with purely serious pursuits. I don't think it HAS been said...but let's just clear up any lingering doubt.

Confession: I play Simpsons Tapped Out. It's a frivilous mobile game that takes zero skill but requires a bunch of patience and wasted time. It's pointless, and I know it's pointless and Ronald frequently reminds me it's pointless as I mindlessly tap on stupid little Simpsons characters collecting "money" and having them to "tasks." But ya know, whatever. I can spend my time as pointlessly or purposefully as I'd like.

I originally downloaded the game because I have a long history with The Simpsons, who were a staple of all of my formative years. Although I haven't watched it consistently since 2002-ish, I was an AVID consumer to that point and the show really mattered to me. For example, when this graphic was floating around Tumblr, I couldn't help but comment that Lisa Simpson vs. Malibu Stacy was EVERYTHING to me as a 10 year old.

[Image text: Lisa Simpson holding a Maliby Stacy doll saying, "Millions of girls will grow up thinking that this is the right way to act--that they can never be more than vacuous ninnies whose only goal is to look pretty, land a rich husband, and spend all day on the phone with their equally vacuous friends talking about how damn terrific it is to look pretty and have a rich husband!"]

Lisa was so often the voice of morality and reason in the show and she was certainly a character I could relate to as a precocious kid in a community of many folks who believed some really backward stuff. However, the truth is that overall, the show is chock full of every -ism there could ever be so it shouldn't surprise me that Tapped Out is a equally disappointing experience. Specifically because of the, I don't know, 20+ characters I have unlocked, there are exactly 4 women and 0 women of color.

I know, I know...why am I bothering to think about something as trivial as this? I guess my point is that this "trivial" stuff really adds up to a culture which makes women invisible in small and big ways. For example, it results in facts like...only 28% of speaking roles in G rated movies are for female characters. And I think it's pretty clear why that's a problem. Girls (and other marginalized groups) don't get to see people who look like them and when they do the choices of characters are limited. It reminded me of this ask I received where a guy accused a girl of being sexist because she choose to always play video games as the one woman character.

That's right...he totally missed out noticing that there are almost no female options and instead got in a tizzy about her always choosing a woman.

Sigh. Male privilege.

I mean, all of this is not news to me. But it's just an endlessly frustrating process to noticed at every turn (even in a silly mobile game) how very underrepresented women, people of color, queer people, fat people, and disabled people are.


This blog has strict comment moderation intended to preserve a safe space. Moderation is managed solely by the blog author. As such, even comments made in good faith will be on a short delay, so please do not attempt to resubmit your comment if it does not immediately appear. Discussion and thoughtful participation are encouraged, but abusive comments of any type will never be published. The blog author reserves the right to publish/delete any comments for any reason, at her sole discretion. 

Our Celebrity Obsession

Ya know, I am tired of what it means to be a celebrity in our culture. I know this might seem incredibly hypocritical as someone who is always blogging about celebrities, but bear with me.

Recently I was helping out some coworkers brainstorm a list of people for an ice breaker with teen girls...the criteria for the list was this: each person had to be a woman, she had to be a positive influence, and she had to be someone the girls would know.

Spring Breakers and Female Exploitation

[Content note: Possible spoilers]

So, this past weekend I saw Spring Breakers. Familiar with it? If not, check out the trailer here.



And here's how the film is described on IMDB, "Four college girls who land in jail after robbing a restaurant in order to fund their spring break vacation find themselves bailed out by a drug and arms dealer who wants them to do some dirty work."

Let me say from the outset: there is certainly a lot that a feminist blogger could tackle about this film. In particular, the race elements deserve a lot of attention and critique. However, I will leave it to Aisha Harris at Slate to give you a good run down of that.

What I am focused on is how I think that Spring Breakers is a perfect example of how male filmmakers exploit women in their storytelling.

Rape Culture Watch: YEP, Still Alive and Well

[Content note: discussions of rape culture, rape apologism, victim blaming, etc.]

Whelp...I'm back. SXSW was a ton of fun and I was so happy to have a much needed break. Sometimes I don't know how much I needed a break until I take one.

Unfortunately, in my time away, it turns out that our rape culture didn't just disappear. Not that I had any expectation it would...but a girl can dream, can't she?

I'm talking about the Steubenville case, verdict, and media coverage specifically. While I tried to be relatively unplugged the past week, it's impossible not to catch news about this, and rightfully so. Most of all, the discussion I've seen from various feminist sources is centered on the way the media is covering it and how their reporting has hit new levels of horrendousness.

Taylor Swift Wants to Have Her Feminist Cake and Scorn It Too

So Taylor Swift has got everyone all a-buzz with her recent comments to Vanity Fair. In short, she basically called out Amy Poehler and Tina Fey for poking fun at her at the Golden Globes. In response to a question about their comments, she said, "You know, Katie Couric is one of my favorite people, because she said to me she had heard a quote that she loved, that said, 'There's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women.'"

Oh...so then there's a special place for you, Taylor? I shared this article on Facebook and my friends and I had quite the nice time picking apart how incredibly hypocritical this is of her to say. So many of her songs invoke slut shaming and/or put her forth as a special snowflake who is way better than all the other girls. Doesn't sound much like helping other women, does it?

I've also seen a quote circulating Tumblr from the same interview. She said,

“For a female to write about her feelings, and then be portrayed as some clingy, insane, desperate girlfriend in need of making you marry her and have kids with her, I think that’s taking something that potentially should be celebrated—a woman writing about her feelings in a confessional way—that’s taking it and turning it and twisting it into something that is frankly a little sexist.”

You know...she kind of has a point here. Kind of. There is a lot of sexist backlash against Swift, I get that. When people make fun of her breakup songs and how many boyfriends she's had and blah blah blah...it's not great. But the BIG problem I have here is that Swift has NEVER been an ally against sexism (in fact she's been a promoter of it) but when she's feeling personally attacked, she suddenly wants to talk about gender equality?

Please excuse me but fuck that noise. I just don't think it's fair to scorn feminism one day and expect it to have your back the next. If she wants to take a moment to examine her work and persona and get on board the F-train express, great. But I don't see that happening any time soon.

This blog has strict comment moderation intended to preserve a safe space. Moderation is managed solely by the blog author. As such, even comments made in good faith will be on a short delay, so please do not attempt to resubmit your comment if it does not immediately appear. Discussion and thoughtful participation are encouraged, but abusive comments of any type will never be published. The blog author reserves the right to publish/delete any comments for any reason, at her sole discretion. 

Is Nothing Off Limits?

[Content note: misogynistic slur]

When you're married to a filmmaker, the Oscars is a pretty big night in your home. We look forward to it for months and try to see all the best picture nominees by the big night. It's an all around fun time for us and certainly something I typically enjoy.

So you can probably guess I didn't expect that I would go to bed heartbroken. My heart broke for nine year old actress, Quvenzhané Wallis. I had tears in my eyes thinking about the words of this post.

You see, Wallis made history by being the young person ever nominated for an Oscar for her role in Beasts of the Southern Wild, quite an amazing accomplishment. But before she even made it in the door, she had to defend her right to be called by her own name.  And then, in front of millions of people and a room full of laughing, strange adults, she was made a sexual object by host and professional scumbag Seth MacFarlane. Then to top if all off, the Onion tweeted a "joke" calling her a cunt.

Before I go on, let me lay this out right now...I've heard the many defenses of these "jokes" so spare me. I get that they are supposed to be satirical and/or aimed at Clooney not Wallis, but can we just pause for a moment and remember that this is a CHILD? I mean, I wish that we could turn the whole culture of awards show humor around--it's sad how they are just aimed at mocking the stars present. But at least the other 99% of those stars are adults who went into it understanding what would happen. How are Wallis' parents going to explain to her what was said, and more importantly, why should they have to? And even if we buy the line that the jokes aren't about Wallis herself (not saying I do!) are we really going to be OK with a child serving as a punchline? Is nothing off limits?

Beyond the fact that this a NINE YEAR OLD CHILD, the racism and sexism run so deep here, it's astounding. And spare me the "but that's what's funny!" BS because it's amazing how Amy and Tina hosted the Golden Globes without making and comments nearly that disgusting and still had the audience rolling.

Unfortunately, this will not be the last time that a brown girl will do something really amazing but then have to deal with everyone shitting on that. It's something we see over and over and over.

I agree with with what FemmeFrustration wrote on Tumblr, "I hope Quvenzhané never finds out what evil people are throwing her way. I hope she goes to the parties tonight and gets a ton of compliments, and a ton of awesome free stuff. I hope she goes home with her family and spends the next few days celebrating." I also hope that when this type of shit happens, the outcry continues to grow louder and is heard. Because it might be a small victory, but at least the Onion took down that heinous tweet and made a decent apology. It's the very, very, very least they could do.

Further reading:
On Protecting (White) Children
A Love Letter to Quvenzhané Wallis

The Voice of a Generation? Whose Voice? Lena Dunham and Racism

[Content note: racist slur]

So, over the weekend, all around jackass Lisa Lampanelli, tweeted this:

[Photo with Lampanelli and Lena Dunham. Text reads, "Me with my nigga @LenaDunham of @HBOGirls - I love this beyotch!"]

I can't believe I have to say this, but maybe listen once and for all fellow white people: You don't get to use the n-word. Not as a "joke." Not if you "have black friends." Not because you, like Lampanelli, have a whole strain of "comedy" based on fucking black men. Not now. Not ever. No way. No how.

All this yuck-yuck, jokey hipster racism bull just gets to me so bad. (Let's be real, hipster racism is JUST RACISM.) And it seems like, even when it's not her own words, Lena Dunham is often related to these instances. She has certainly made the hipster racism mistake herself but she also frequently keeps company those people who are entirely race insensitive. Take the whole Caitlin Moran debacle, in which Moran defended Dunham's whitewashed depiction of New York in Girls and said she "literally couldn't give a shit about" the criticism against Dunham. 

I don't want to jump into a discussion about whether or not Girls is a good show (because that's something I literally couldn't give a shit about...I don't watch it for many reasons so I don't now anything about it beyond what I read and what others say.) But I DO want to tackle the foolish idea that Dunham is the "voice of a generation." 

Firstly--this whole idea just came about because Dunham wrote that line into an episode of Girls and it wasn't meant to be taken seriously. But secondly, and much more importantly, all of this racism surrounding Dunham's person and work routinely excludes entire segments of people. So how in the world can she be said to represent a whole damn generation? I get that she is doing some interesting things in that she's a young woman running a show and she looks much more like the chick next to you on the bus than the woman on the billboard, but, to me, all of that feminist karma is completely depleted by the fact that she is so full of race fail. Same goes for Moran. Despite a few concerns here and there, I loved "How to Be a Woman" but then came her dismissal of race entirely. How can I get behind her as a feminist icon?

Simply put: I can't be your feminist cheerleader if you marginalize entire groups of people. That's not feminism. 

Although I'm older than Dunham, I can't help but feel that as a 20 something, I fall roughly into the "generation" she is said to represent. I don't want to be complicit in the creation of a new, edgy culture which is really just reiterating the same old bullshit by being silent. I can only hope that all of the very real, legitimate criticism against Dunham is heard--not so much as to influence her work but moreover to let it be known that Dunham isn't our voice. 

Related:

Intersectionalism 101

Working on Anti-Racism

GIVE US OUR NAMES

[Content note: misogyny, mentions of murder case.]

Dear Media,

This is Reeva Steenkamp.

She has a name. And she was a living, active person who had her own thoughts and life. When you are reporting about her murder, I'd really appreciate if you would give her the dignity of calling her by her name. STOP referring to her as "Oscar Pistorius' elite model girlfriend."

Sincerely,

A. Lynn

---
This topic was brought to my attention last night by Jill Filipovic's twitter. As she pointed out, the New York Times wrote 23 paragraphs about Reeva Steenkamp's murder, and mentioned her name once, in the 8th paragraph. Not to be out done, the Washington Post referred to her as a "leggy blonde" and said, "While known for her bikini-clad, vamping photo spreads, she tweeted messages urging women to stand up against rape." As Filipovic rightfully pointed out, it's hardly like those things are in opposition to each other.

I went to bed last night with the idea for this blog but on the way to work this morning I heard not one but three updates from NPR news about this murder case, all of which named Pistorius and just referred to Steenkamp as his girlfriend never stating her name.

Needless to say, at the point of writing this, I'm verging on rage. Is it really so much to ask that we refer to women by their names and not their relationship to men? Especially a man which might have murdered her! I've written before about the importance of names to me as well as the fact that our society far too often reduces women to their relationship to men and boys. But Steenkamp's case has made this trend abundantly more clear and all the more disturbing.

Even allies like President Barack Obama mess up on this front. As was pointed out by many feminists live tweeting his State of the Union address on Tuesday, Obama frequently frames women's issues by stressing the importance of helping our "mothers, sisters, and wives." It's as if we can't decide, collectively as a nation, that women matter in and of themselves. 

I truly believe that the way we use language shapes our reality. When we describe women by their relationship to men, we are again and again affirming a sense of male entitlement and ownership. It could be easy to brush this under the rug and talk about how it's "no big deal" but I absolutely refuse to ignore this trend. I mean--really, I'm in the year 2013 and I'm lobbying for a woman who was murdered to be called by her own name and not by her relationship to a man? Seriously?

I'm not even sure what else to say. The importance of this simple request should be self-evident.

Women's Bodies as Public Property

[Content note: discussion of body shaming, rape culture, victim blaming, street harassment.]

Goodness, women sure take a lot of shit when they claim their bodies as their own private possession instead of public domain, don't they?

Zero Dark Thirty. Strong Female Character, But Dangerous Messages

Jessica Chastain as CIA analyst, Maya

So I started writing this piece yesterday. I came home all amped up from having enjoyed Zero Dark Thirty and I wanted to blog about how awesome I felt the female character was in it. In the process of researching what other people were saying to bolster my views, I came across some very legitimate concerns of the film's depictions of torture (details later.)

It changed how I felt about the film in general, and I decided to go back and think about things with this new found information. Below are my reworked thoughts. (What an important reminder that your own personal interpretation of things, while valid and important, can often be incomplete without interacting with others and listening to what's out there.)

I'll try to keep this relatively spoiler free, but no guarantees. But, let's be honest...this one of those pre-spoiled movies. It's called history.

Examining Resolution Season

[Content note: body shame, weight loss]

Happy New Year!

And welcome to one of the most triggering times for fat shame and weight loss talk. As our attention turns to resolutions, the overwhelming message we receive at every turn is that we're disgusting. Weight loss product and gym membership ads will be at an all time high. The same culture which just told us to engage in the excesses of the winter holiday season, will now tell us we're ugly, lazy, sacks of fat who need to tone up, trim down, and burn calories, at any cost.

I've written before about New Year's resolutions and how weight loss goals are problematic. I stand by that idea, and it's certainly important to remember, given all of the fat shaming messages we're about to encounter. But the more I think about it, the more I'm beginning to wonder if maybe the whole New Year's resolution thing is a bad idea all together.