Saturday, November 21, 2015

Just eat the whole damn thing

[Content note: food and weight stuff.]

With Thanksgiving less than a week away, my brain as been fine tuned to the up-tick in food shaming that is all around us....(and of course the ever present doubly confusing "indulge! indulge!" of November/December followed by the "change yourself, you disgusting fat fuck!" of January.)

One of my favorite things to write about this time of year is how we can step away from fat shaming during the holidays and take care of ourselves through what is often a stressful time of year.

This year, I'd like to add this message to the mix: Just eat the whole damn thing, ladies.

[Image text: Gif of Liz Lemon saying, "I can't have it all!" while eating a doughnut and her mouth is full.]
 A couple of recent experiences have made me think about this:

1) I volunteered at an event recently with a pregnant woman who was obviously usually very thin. The event had a DELICIOUS dessert that we were all eating and she was talking about how the best thing about being pregnant is eating dessert and not feeling guilty because you can just say that the baby wants to eat it....Sigh. Ya know, because you wanting to eat it isn't enough.

2) I realized that one of my biggest pet peeves is when people split up pieces of food in a shared space (ie, taking half of a doughnut and leaving the other half in box in the break room.) It's a pet peeve because I don't want fondled half foods but also because I've realized this is one of those "things women do." I posted about it on Facebook and it spawned dozens of comments, ALL of whom were women many admitting they do this themselves; often because, I quote, "I'm trying to trick myself into thinking I'm not going to come back and just eat the other half."

So let me drive my point home.

Just eat. Eat the whole damn thing. Eat what you want.


When you're around your Thanksgiving table next week or when you're at a holiday party or whatever over the next 6 weeks (and forever!) if you want to eat something, please, for the love of god, EAT IT. 

And if you don't want to eat it, then don't. That's fine.

But in either case, don't contribute to judgey, guilt-ridden, value-laden toxic relationships with food that permeate our society.

I'm sick of comments like what I mentioned in #1. Can't we all just eat, drink, and be merry? It's not eat, drink, and constantly-feel-like-shit-about-everything-you-put-in-your-body.

You're not a bad person if you eat what you want to eat. You're not a bad person if that's a whole cupcake or 6 Christmas cookies or extra butter on your potatoes (and you're not a better person if you drink kale smoothies and only eat organic quinoa salads). You're not a bad person if your weight fluctuates or if you skip a workout or if you binge watch Netflix on your couch for 2 days straight.

Nothing about your body or appetite makes you a bad person. I promise.

Please see the commenting policy before replying to this post.

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Teaching Kids to Lie...Because Santa.

This isn't really "feminist" or even "important" but in this space I get to write and process whatever I want, so deal.

Today, I read two things, back to back on my social media pages, that gave me pause. First was a post on Tumblr which read, "When a child is punished for their honesty, they begin to lie."

The next was this image on Facebook:
[Image text reads: "When you stop believing in Santa Claus, you get underwear."]
Besides the obvious illustration of the difference between my Facebook feed and my Tumblr dashboard, I thought this was interesting to see back to back.

I've long been disturbed by the, "you must believe in Santa Claus!" rule that permeates our society. Maybe it's because I don't have kids so I don't get the appeal, but I'm not sure why this is SUCH an important lie Christian families in America feel they must tell their kids.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not opposed to the mythology and fun around Santa, and signing gifts as from Santa or whatever...but the full on creation and pushing of the lie that HE ABSOLUTELY DOES EXIST AND GAVE YOU THOSE GIFTS AND THE ELF ON THE SHELF IS WATCHING AND DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION IT is beyond me.

I know numerous families, including my own, where kids aren't allowed to say stuff like, "Santa isn't real!" and if you do, then the response is, automatically, "Ok, well you don't get gifts anymore!" What kid is going to be like, "That's cool, keep your gifts and your dirty lies, Grandma, Santa is a hoax." They, instead, begin indulging in the continuation of the lie, pretending they don't know how it works, and teaching the lie to younger kids, and so on.

Of course, I know there's a difference between this lie and lies which are directly intended to hurt people--but how are parents able to mange the cognitive dissonance around punishing their kids for lying, but then saying this kind of stuff to them?

What would be so bad about a discussion of the spirit of giving at Christmas, and Santa as a symbol of that...but the gift giving is between actual, real life people? Why does it have to be "Believe in Santa!!!!"

It weirds me out.

I think there is value to the phrase that I started this all with: "When a child is punished for their honesty, they begin to lie." I hate the idea of punishing kids for speaking their truth...whether is something as small as, "Hey, I don't think that this Santa thing is what the adults are making out to be..." all they way up to bigger things that parents really need to know and listen to like, "I'm not a boy" or "I don't like it when Uncle Rob comes over."

Just a thought.

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Monday, October 5, 2015

That gross feeling when...

[Content note: rape culture]

I've written about rape culture ad nauseam, but every now and then one of its artifacts pops up and takes me by surprise.

Well, maybe not "surprise," but "disgust," at least.

Last week I had free tickets to Sicario, Emily Blunt's latest starring role. It's a rather grim film about the government's work against drug cartels on the boarder. It's also one of the more violent things I've watched recently...but that's not why I'm writing.  All I knew about Sicario going into it is that there had been some rumblings about how Blunt's character was almost rewritten to be a man. So my interest was mildly piqued. I kept looking for some interesting gender dynamic, but nothing really emerged that was of much interest to me anyway.

But then came the moment that stuck with me. It was something so "small" but is truly my take away, and it has very little to do with the actual film and a whole lot to do with the audience and our society. In one scene, Blunt's (male) partner, played by Daniel Kaluuya, was being subdued by a Navy Seal and the Seal says something along the lines of, "Just lie back and take it baby."

Then half the audience laughed.

It sent a gross chill down my spine and Ronald immediately looked at me and temporarily broke his "never, ever speak in the Alamo Drafthouse" rule to say, "That's not fucking funny..." with a concerned/confused look.

And the thing is, it wasn't funny. Not only because it's a disgusting reference to rape, but also because, as mentioned, this movie is GRIM. It's not one of those serious flicks with a periodic laugh to break the tension. I mean, I think there was maaaaybe one other light, slightly humorous moment where Kaluuya pokes fun at Blunt's character for her bra, but that's it.

My point is that even against the current emotional place this film puts you in, many people still chuckled at an allusion to rape. That's how strong rape culture is. That's how lightly we take it.

(And it's not lost on me that Kaluuya is the film's only prominent black character, too.)

Just to be clear--I don't even know if I'm calling out this film itself for that line, necessarily. In the context of the moment and the characters present, it's not unrealistic that one of those digesting men would have said something disturbing. Blunt and Kaluuya are outsiders in the world they're dropped in, and they're frequently unnerved by what the other characters are doing. It's not like these are "nice" people. They're actively abusing their power throughout the time. So maybe this moment was not written as a punch line.

But the audience thought it was chuckle worthy, regardless.

It still makes me kinda sick thinking about it. And like I said, this is a "small" thing. A throw away moment. Probably didn't stand out to or strike many other people. But to me, it's just another of the thousands of sad, daily examples our rape culture.

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Friday, September 11, 2015

Honoring the right to self preservation

Let's talk about honoring someone else's right to self preservation, or subtitle: why I won't be watching Nicole Arbour's "Dear Fat People" video.

A few years ago, I learned a really important lesson from Trudy of Gradient Lair: It's not cool to send someone, "have you seen ____?" messages. I think when I first heard her talking about it, it was in a series of tweets I can't locate at the moment, but the heart of her ideas about this can be found at her piece entitled, "11 Things People Need to Stop Emailing Me." She wrote: 
99% of the time I heard about the same shit you heard about. Thus, I don’t need my Tumblr Inbox filled with a bunch of links to stories that I usually read 72 hours - 1 week before you sent them. Even if I did hear about something, I am NOT required to comment on it if I do not want to. I am not a 24 hour on-demand opinion generation machine. Conversely, sometimes I purposely skip stories because they are stressful, triggering or simply not of interest to me. And for Whites especially, stop emailing me every first grade level article or term you see on race. You’re in race kindergarten.  I am Methuselah. So stop...
At the time, I was like, "Good point," filed this away in my brain, and moved on with my day...but as my own Tumblr picked up in popularity, I started to much better understand the importance of what she was saying. Of course, my white privilege has shielded me from anything near the harassment that Trudy faces on social media. But when Nicole Arbour's now infamous "Dear Fat People" video blew up, I got a taste of how much people need to remember to honor someone else's right to self preservation. And how annoying/disturbing a bulk of "have you seen ____" messages can be.

As Trudy points out, sending something like this to someone can be potentially stressful or triggering. In the case of Arbour's video, I am a fat lady who blogs frequently about fatphobia and being a fat lady and all that entails. So I popped to mind for a few people when someone with a large platform was spewing off vile fatphobic bullshit. I get that. But it seems very different to wait and see if I'm going to talk about it than to start demanding I do. Suddenly my blogging email address and my Tumblr inbox at FacebookSexism had a few dozen mentions of the video. Some were just submissions of screenshots from people talking about it on Facebook. No problem. But some were "Did you see this?" and "What do you think about Nicole Arbour's video?"

I haven't been moderating as much at FBS as I used to for a variety of reasons and the Arbour thing hit right when I was in the middle of one such NOT moderating time frame. But because my inbox had a steady trickle of content related to it, I went ahead and shared these comments, tacking onto another plus size woman's thoughts, who fielded a similar "what do you think?" question:
I have no need to watch it. I’ve heard it all my whole life which is why it’s so fucking absurd anyway (poising it as “finally someone said it” Ha!) PLUS I deserve some level of self preservation so I gotta avoid this one. 
I'm just trying to wrap my mind around the mentality which leads a thin person to send a fat person a gushingly fatphobic video. Or a white person to send flagrantly white supremacist content to a black y'all not see who messed up that is?

I get that these inquiries can be made in good faith...coming from an "I admire you and I want to know what your thoughts are on this" place. But because these questions are typically made to people with a very large and visible social media presence, you can just assume that they've already seen them and they don't need to be prodded to write about it. I mean, if I had it in me to watch Arbour spout off the same BS society had told me every day so I could put my reactions to it out there, I would.

I was so fed up from the whole thing that I deleted 5-6 submissions for FBS about Arbour that would have been otherwise fine content to feature there, shaming people who defended her in comment threads, etc. But I was so over it that they hit the trash bin right along side the "What do you think?"s.

Pause before you send a message like this to someone. Chances are your inquiry of this nature is unnecessary and a quick Google search would reveal 1) similar things the person you are approaching has already written or 2) other sources talking about the subject matter already that you can go read; people who are in the headspace/have the interest/time/whatever to tackle the topic. Shit, even go write about it yourself if you want. Just give someone a break before you try to introduce something into their lives which could not only unduly demand their time and attention, but also hurt them.

Please see the commenting policy before replying to this post.

Friday, August 21, 2015

I've hit the big time! And a quick note on being passive aggressive

After over 5 years of blogging here, I am pleased to announce that I have arrived. Today, I woke up to this glorious email...

Good news! On Aug 21, 2015, we sent you a payment for your Google AdSense earnings. 
I've done it. I've arrived. Hitting that sweet, sweet payment threshold is a game changer. As of today, I am $100.33 richer.

I want to thank all of you who made this possible. Everyone who has ever visited here...with a special thanks to those of you who accidentally clicked on one of my Google AdSense ads and the anti-feminists who posted my blog to many, many hate mongering subreddits giving me a boost in page views. You've all helped me earn a part of this $100.33. I couldn't have done it without.

I'll try not to change. I'll try to stay the person I've always been and remember my humble roots as I ascend to super stardom.

Ok, enough sarcasm. As much as knowing that my work here has averaged out to about 15 cents a post stings, it was a happy surprise to get that email.

On to a totally unrelated topic. Last week, I saw this post going around Tumblr, and I just want to comment on it briefly:
My boyfriend came home to our tiny apartment at 1 AM on a weeknight with 4 of his obnoxious, drunken friends in tow. He knew I had to work the next day, he knew I absolutely hated those particular friends, and he knew I hate surprise guests. So I just went in the bedroom and tried to sleep, unsuccessfully. This guy is a massively neurotic neat freak- he is physically unable to relax in a room that is not clean to his standards. So after he finally passed out, I went into the kitchen and poured maple syrup all over the floor and told him one of his idiot friends did it. He just about had a panic attack. It took him hours to get rid of the sticky. Those friends were never invited back.
I know this is supposed to be a funny post and omg how hilarious that she solved her problem this way (if it's true) but let me just add: NO.

I literally can't think of a way to more passively aggressively treat your partner. This is how manipulative, toxic relationships operate. So before you give a chuckle and shrug it off, might I suggest that you leave this behavior as (hopefully) fake LOLz on the internet and NOT actual behavior in your relationship?

Cool? Cool.

Now let me go make it rain with all my Washingtons. Happy Friday, y'all.

Please see the commenting policy before replying to this post.

Thursday, July 30, 2015

The Empty Chair and My Life

[Content note: rape, rape culture, abuse, victim blaming]

A few days ago, the latest cover of New York Magazine sparked a lot of discussion. It depicted 35 of Bill Cosby's rape victims seated, with an empty chair at the end to symbolize the 11 other known victims, but also the women all around us who are survivors of sexual assault.

#TheEmptyChair was a following discussion on Twitter, that was both chilling and unsurprising. As a woman, I am all too aware of the prevalence of rape. I mean, I can throw all kind of statistics at you, but none of that is as real to me as the stories that I know from my own friends and family. Hearing that a sexual assault happens every 107 seconds in the US or that 1 in 6 American women are survivors (a conservative figure) means very little compared to the deeply personal stories shared to me by those I love most. But these statistics are important because, still in the face of all the evidence, our rape culture continuously shames, silence, and blames survivors and victims.

Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Unanswered questions

[Content note: harassment]

In being very active on Tumblr, I'm always a little unnerved when my posts are picked up by what I have affectionately termed the "pro-oppression side."

Ever since I started picking up followers, I've had a pretty steady stream of interactions with that side. Some are more mundane than anything. Every week I "ignore" dozens of them...and since Tumblr has recently upgraded it's ignore/block feature, I feel pretty good about every one of the hundreds of accounts I've put on that list.

But when the pro-oppression folks hijack a post of mine, despite my pretty effective means of blocking them out of brain, they still raise infinite questions for me., why would anyone be in the business of trying to limit genders and gender expression of others? WHY DO YOU CARE?

And...just because you hate what I write about and do, is that REALLY  a reason enough to create entire fake accounts to harass me? Does wishing me death further your cause?

(Side note: there have probably been 3-4 accounts created in the past couple of years, with the sole intention of meticulously reblogging me and adding hate-filled commentary. I can't link to one right now because despite calling them out and using the awesome Mean Girls Regina George, "why are you so obsessed withe me?" gif, I can't find the posts. Which is actually probably better for my mental state right now.)

Then there was the absolute creep who decided to attack me on all fronts, TumblrTwitter, and in my email. Someone who pretty clearly has dedicated a shit ton of time to harassing feminists. I want to ask them, why? How is that something you want to spend your time on?

And even if you don't go to those incredible lengths, what are you doing in my 3 year old tweets? Do you think you'll change my mind?

Why do you waste your time?

Is your life that sad and empty?

What do you gain from wanting feminists and other people who write about social justice to shut up? Why are you so threatened?

Ah yes, the unanswered questions. And they can't ever offer me an explanation, but I don't think they actually know themselves. They're not going to admit the truth anyway. (ie, I'm lonely. I'm afraid. I'm bored. I'm a bigot.)

Please see the commenting policy before replying to this post.

Monday, July 6, 2015

When You've Got a Case of the Rape Apologism

[Content note: rape, rape apologism]

Whelp, another month has somehow managed to slip by. I can't even say that I've been too busy to write or anything, because I have been taking some days off work here and there to staycation. But relieving myself of the needless imposed feeling that I MUST produce content has been pretty damn great, I must admit, and thusly the content has been sparse and I'm much happier regardless.

Anyway, I'm not here to revel in my decision to write less. I'm here to talk about a disgusting rapist/rape apologist who I got this lovely gem of a comment from in my inbox today.

That's right folks, you saw it here first. "King Steve" thinks that asking people to seek consent is like "contracts." (And I have genuinely no idea what is meant by "methodical/mechanical consent.")

Let me make it immensely clear, if someone say something like this, they are in all likelihood a rapist. I mean this very sincerely--who but a rapist would be opposed to consent...or try to say that issues of consent are as complicated as "contracts?" What motivation does anyone other than a rapist have to think like this? Why would anyone other than a rapist want to say, "Enthusiastic consent is ridiculous."

When you say something like this, you are sending a message out into the world that you cannot be trusted to respect the feelings or bodily autonomy of others. You are saying you are incapable of do something as simple as speaking to your partner. What might seem to someone like "King Steve" to be an offhanded comment about how "you need a law degree to understand this stuff" (or what-the-fuck-ever is meant by this) is more plainly understood by me as, "I don't care about consent."

No really.

Stop for a minute and think about this. And now try to tell me why someone who is a good person, generally cares about others, and is respectful of all boundaries would EVER engage in rape apologism like this. What would possibly be the reason, if not trying to justify their own bad behavior?

I'm waiting.

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Thursday, June 4, 2015

A few thoughts on Spy and being a fat lady

[Image text: Melissa McCarthy as a spy with a gun, but dressed as an older woman in a pink track suit and cat shirt]
I had a chance to see Melissa McCarthy's new flick, Spy, Wednesday night at a free advanced screening. (This will stay relatively spoiler free.)

It's not the best or funniest movie I've ever seen, but it definitely did crack me up. (I'm a sucker for McCarthy.) And in my usual fashion, I started to think about the messages in it. I got a little flummoxed. On one hand, McCarthy's character, Susan Cooper, is the butt of a lot of fat jokes and shaming...but on the other, it's kinda because everyone has underestimated her. She pulls through to prove herself an incredibly competent spy in the field--who takes things into her own hands (literally) and is successful in her mission, partly because she's able to leverage the stereotypes believed about her.

So that was kind of cool, but still something didn't sit right with me. Then I read Meredith Borders' piece at Birth. Movies. Death. and it all made sense. Borders posits that Spy is actually commentary on McCarthy's career. She writes:

Throughout the span of McCarthy's career, she's often played three types of characters: sweet, clumsy, adorable (Gilmore Girls, Mike and Molly, Samantha Who), dowdy and bumbling (Bridesmaids, Tammy) or raunchy yet surprisingly competent (The Heat). She plays each convincingly and with a certain amount of compelling charm, even when her character is meant to be profoundly uncharming. What she's rarely allowed to be - or has chosen not to glamorous and composed, which just so happens to be the persona McCarthy projects with ease on the red carpet and in interviews.

Monday, June 1, 2015

Old women are just so gross. And old.

...and old is apparently now 35-37.

I've seen a bunch of things lately that have reminded me how we so specifically set an expiration date on women's relevance. What I'm talking about is very tied to my firmly held belief that society views women's worth as a function of their desirability to the average man. And because of the interaction between ageism and misogyny, it means that women over a certain age (I'm not exactly sure where the cut off is, but it generally seems to be around 40) are worthless.

Amy Schumer took this on rather well in a recent skit for her show called, "Last Fuckable Day." She stumbles across Tina Fey, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, and Patricia Arquette having a party (holy White Lady feminism crew...I know, I know) to celebrate Louis-Dreyfus' "last fuckable day." It's pretty funny, but also it just rings true for how women in general, and women in Hollywood specifically, are treated as they age.

Perhaps nothing more clearly demonstrates this than the recent story of Maggie Gyllenhaal being told at age 37 that she's too old to play the romantic opposite of a 55 year old man. As she told The Wrap
"There are things that are really disappointing about being an actress in Hollywood that surprise me all the time...I’m 37 and I was told recently I was too old to play the lover of a man who was 55. It was astonishing to me. It made me feel bad, and then it made me feel angry, and then it made me laugh."
If you pay any attention to movies basically at all, then this really isn't surprising to you. It's, sadly, a rather tested principle. In fact, as Vulture reports, on average, leading men age, but their love interests don't. Here's just one of the graphs they compiled, showing the growing age difference between Denzel Washington and his co-stars. They found this for numerous older A List male celebrities.

Photo credit Vulture 

Another age related story recently made me think more about this topic. News broke that Rebel Wilson is actually 35, not 29. GASP!!!! THE HORROR!! Apparently, this is something people care about...? I mean, I can certainly understand Wilson not talking about her real age, given all that I've already mentioned about ageism + misogyny in Hollywood (plus fatphobia, in her case.) But is outrage and an investigation really needed? Does this really impact people's perception of her? DOES IT EVEN MATTER?!


Like I said, all of this just registers to me as further demonstration of the whole "the further away that a woman is from what the average dude bro wants to bone, the more worthless she is" principle. And we could pretend that these things are isolated to "what women in Hollywood deal with and therefore not a big deal" but this stuff both influences and is influenced by our culture. Hollywood doesn't exist in a vacuum. It's consumed by us all (to varying degrees) and whether or not we believe it, it impacts perceptions of ourselves and others. 

Please see the commenting policy before replying to this post.

Friday, May 22, 2015

Mad Max, Feminism, and Being A Man

This post was contributed by Ronald Short, a connoisseur of the cinema living and working in Austin, TX. He eats, sleeps, and breathes film and filmmaking. He also happens to be my partner. When I read his post on Tumblr about Mad Max, and his words for his fellow men, I was excited to share it here. I loved the film myself and  was really excited to talk about it a ton with him. 

You can follow Ronald on Twitter or check out his production company, Short Pictures Independent on Facebook.

Mad Max: Fury Road is an action masterpiece. The practical stunts, effects, and story (the whole movie is a chase, an army of bad guys…er, War Boys relentlessly pursuing a small group of women, including their leader Furiosa (Charlize Theron) and our titular hero Max (Tom Hardy). Our protagonists are trying to escape the grasp of the nefarious Immortan Joe (Hugh Keays-Byrne) who will stop at nothing to get his “property” back) will often leave you gazing at the screen with your mouth agape in disbelief. Like I said on my social media after seeing it a second time, this movie is a masterclass in editing and structure. It’s one I will be watching a lot over the next however many years I have left on this rock to not only relive that enjoyment, but to study George Miller’s brushstrokes as a filmmaker and artist. It’s that damn good.

If this movie was purely its special effects and action sequences, it would still be pretty great, one that would stand shoulder to shoulder with some of the best action films out there. However, as I’m sure many of you probably know by now even if you haven’t seen the flick, it isn’t your run of the mill action film. This is a FEMINIST action film. And it’s time for the world to fuckin’ accept it and ENJOY it.


Thursday, May 7, 2015

"Well Intentioned" Fatphobes Can Kiss My Huge Ass

[Content note: fatphobia, body shaming]

A while back, I published a submitted photo on Tumblr where a fat woman was doing a move on a pole and someone had compared her to a roast chicken on the spit. Included were several very offensive comments. It was all around the perfect type of stuff to feature on a blog that calls out bigots on social media.

But I knew, right as I posted it, that the comments and direction it would eventually go, would make me want to scream. It always does. Even in "progressive" spaces...when fatphobia comes up front and center, someone is bound to derail and/or say something "well intentioned" that is actually incredibly toxic.

I was not wrong.

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Mansplaining: A Case Study

Well, well, well. It seems something has pissed me off enough to actually write.

In the 6 years that I've been writing here, I've long strayed from the "misandry!!1!" "men are scum" side of things. In fact, I've probably gone WAY too far out of my way to be inclusive to men. What can I say? This blog has been with me a long time time and covered my evolution of theory and learnings.

Anyway, a professional experience on Friday left me so fucking pissed off that all I could think for about an hour after was "I hate men I hate men I hate men I hate men I hate men I hate men I hate men I hate men."

Friday, March 20, 2015


I'm sitting here at 1am just randomly tired and angsty. I moderated over at FacebookSexism today (which I'm down to doing about once a week for reasons of self care and being busy) and after managing a whole bunch of hateful trolls that popped up like they do after every time I post (block, block, blockity block) I remembered that this blog exists.

Oh, this blog. My dear am I to do with you?

It's no secret that my writing has petered off in the past few months. It's not just LESS content: it's (what I would consider) significantly less substantial content.

I didn't happen over night so it's taken me a while to notice that I'm at a point where it's like the wind is out of my damn sails. I've seen a lot of bloggers in many fields reach this spot, or something similar to it. For me it's a real writing block, unlike the others I've had. My brain isn't thinking, "What should I write about?" or "What should be my inspiration?" or "When the heck can I find time to write?" to

"Do I even want to write anymore?"
"Is this thing worth keeping up?"
"Is this what I want?"

As I've mentioned before, my personality type is such that I beat myself up about not producing content. I want to reach the goals I set myself. Since 2009, that has been important to me. But it's just sort of NOT anymore. Where I used to want to write 3 times a week, I now can let weeks slip by without putting a single word on the page.

And I'm not upset about it.

I don't really know where this is going. I'm not announcing that I'm shutting this thing down or anything. I'm immensely proud of (most) everything I've done here and I definitely want to keep it open as a place to come rant if I need, but I'm just letting go of any expectations that I have for myself about it.

I'm just working through it all still and I know, I know, who cares? But yeah, that's where I am right now if anyone is wondering.

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Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Please join me in supporting abortion access in Texas

I'm joining some friends for the Bowl-a-thon in support of The Lilith Fund for Reproductive Equity this year! My team is called Friday Night Rights!


Please support me by donating to my page as I work toward likely getting the lowest score the Bowl-a-thon has ever seen! (Good news! Your donation will make a difference even if I publicly disgrace myself bowling.) I'm bowling because I believe that everyone should have access to the abortions they need, regardless of how much money they have. Because of unfair and unnecessary laws, safe and legal abortions can be out of reach of those who don't have the money to pay for them. I don't think that's right, so I'm doing something about it.


Y'all. Seriously.

We know it ain't easy for abortion seekers, especially here in Texas. I'm trying to help in any small way I can. I need your support.


Several times a month I receive thankful messages for creating and managing this page and educating folks about various issues like misogyny and rape culture. I'm so appreciative of these comments and I ask that if you have benefited from my work here at all, consider pitching in $5 for my fundraiser. If that is not accessible for you, then share/boost!

I'll love you forever.


Please see the commenting policy before replying to this post.