Rape Culture Watch: Donald Trump edition

[Content note: sexual assault, rape]

This election cycle is such a shit show that I haven't wasted much of my very scarce and precious time commenting on it.

It, literally and figuratively, has made me want to puke. Proud racist, sexist, xenophobic, islamophobic, and (likely) rapist, Donald Trump has consumed the headlines. By now everyone is well aware of the disgusting content of a tape from 2005 where he was talking flippantly about sexually assaulting women. Numerous accusers have emerged.

None of this is news to you, I'm sure.

I want to briefly speak to one small part of it. You see, I was just watching the "Not OK" video about this all, in which various women and girls share about their own experiences of sexual assault and harassment. I immediately related to them, thinking specifically about some really scary incidents of unwelcome groping in high school and terrifying comments by grown men in public when I was as young as 12. Memories that, despite my line of work and my general knowledge/empowerment in this area, I have tried to deeply suppress into the recesses of my mind.

Then I found myself treading into some new shitty thoughts, "If I talk about these experiences, people will think I'm making it up because no one would do that to me, I'm not pretty enough."

Rape culture is a hell of a drug.

Here I am, speaking out against this type of mentality all the time, but I apply it to myself. You see, the rape culture tells lots of lies, one of which being that fat/conventionally unattractive women should be thankful if someone has "interest" in us or that you "can't" be raped if you're fat or whatever. (See a great piece at Black Girl Dangerous about this.)

In fact, as I was having this thought, I remembered that Trump has his own fucked up take on this line of reasoning. He actually said: "She wouldn't be my first choice" about one of his accusers. That's right, y'all...a nominee of a major American political party for president essentially said, "I'd be a rapist if the girl's hot enough."

I know, I know, this mentality is disgusting and here I was thinking it myself.

Ah well, all it proves is that 1) YES the rape culture is still alive and well 2) Trump is a disgusting piece of shit and 3) I'm still on that journey to self acceptance. Lots of things we already knew.

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A quick note on Kesha and rape culture

[Content note: rape, abuse]

I don't have the wherewithal or knowledge to write about this in detail, and lord knows that many, many people are doing the topic far more justice than I could...but let me not go without saying my support of Kesha in her legal battle against Dr. Luke and Sony.

I've read a ton on the case, but mostly from opinion pieces, so I can't say I have a full picture of it all. However, when a Facebook friend posted a status yesterday asking how we can be sure that the allegations against Dr. Luke are correct, I couldn't help but pipe up.

My reply was this counter question: How can someone EVER gather "concrete proof" that they were raped/abuse/controlled over a number of years by someone very close to them? I think about my own past of abuse and I have literally no way to prove or show it. My memories and the internal scars I carry are all there is.

As was recently suggested to me over on Tumblr, "rape culture thrives on the premise that absence of evidence is evidence of absence."

It's so true.

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A few thoughts on Spy and being a fat lady

[Image text: Melissa McCarthy as a spy with a gun, but dressed as an older woman in a pink track suit and cat shirt]

I had a chance to see Melissa McCarthy's new flick, Spy, Wednesday night at a free advanced screening. (This will stay relatively spoiler free.)

It's not the best or funniest movie I've ever seen, but it definitely did crack me up. (I'm a sucker for McCarthy.) And in my usual fashion, I started to think about the messages in it. I got a little flummoxed. On one hand, McCarthy's character, Susan Cooper, is the butt of a lot of fat jokes and shaming...but on the other, it's kinda because everyone has underestimated her. She pulls through to prove herself an incredibly competent spy in the field--who takes things into her own hands (literally) and is successful in her mission, partly because she's able to leverage the stereotypes believed about her.

So that was kind of cool, but still something didn't sit right with me. Then I read Meredith Borders' piece at Birth. Movies. Death. and it all made sense. Borders posits that Spy is actually commentary on McCarthy's career. She writes:

Throughout the span of McCarthy's career, she's often played three types of characters: sweet, clumsy, adorable (Gilmore Girls, Mike and Molly, Samantha Who), dowdy and bumbling (Bridesmaids, Tammy) or raunchy yet surprisingly competent (The Heat). She plays each convincingly and with a certain amount of compelling charm, even when her character is meant to be profoundly uncharming. What she's rarely allowed to be - or has chosen not to be...is glamorous and composed, which just so happens to be the persona McCarthy projects with ease on the red carpet and in interviews.

Old women are just so gross. And old.

...and old is apparently now 35-37.

I've seen a bunch of things lately that have reminded me how we so specifically set an expiration date on women's relevance. What I'm talking about is very tied to my firmly held belief that society views women's worth as a function of their desirability to the average man. And because of the interaction between ageism and misogyny, it means that women over a certain age (I'm not exactly sure where the cut off is, but it generally seems to be around 40) are worthless.

Amy Schumer took this on rather well in a recent skit for her show called, "Last Fuckable Day." She stumbles across Tina Fey, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, and Patricia Arquette having a party (holy White Lady feminism crew...I know, I know) to celebrate Louis-Dreyfus' "last fuckable day." It's pretty funny, but also it just rings true for how women in general, and women in Hollywood specifically, are treated as they age.

Perhaps nothing more clearly demonstrates this than the recent story of Maggie Gyllenhaal being told at age 37 that she's too old to play the romantic opposite of a 55 year old man. As she told The Wrap

"There are things that are really disappointing about being an actress in Hollywood that surprise me all the time...I’m 37 and I was told recently I was too old to play the lover of a man who was 55. It was astonishing to me. It made me feel bad, and then it made me feel angry, and then it made me laugh."

If you pay any attention to movies basically at all, then this really isn't surprising to you. It's, sadly, a rather tested principle. In fact, as Vulture reports, on average, leading men age, but their love interests don't. Here's just one of the graphs they compiled, showing the growing age difference between Denzel Washington and his co-stars. They found this for numerous older A List male celebrities.

Photo credit Vulture 

Another age related story recently made me think more about this topic. News broke that Rebel Wilson is actually 35, not 29. GASP!!!! THE HORROR!! Apparently, this is something people care about...? I mean, I can certainly understand Wilson not talking about her real age, given all that I've already mentioned about ageism + misogyny in Hollywood (plus fatphobia, in her case.) But is outrage and an investigation really needed? Does this really impact people's perception of her? DOES IT EVEN MATTER?!

Sigh.

Like I said, all of this just registers to me as further demonstration of the whole "the further away that a woman is from what the average dude bro wants to bone, the more worthless she is" principle. And we could pretend that these things are isolated to "what women in Hollywood deal with and therefore not a big deal" but this stuff both influences and is influenced by our culture. Hollywood doesn't exist in a vacuum. It's consumed by us all (to varying degrees) and whether or not we believe it, it impacts perceptions of ourselves and others. 

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Mad Max, Feminism, and Being A Man

This post was contributed by Ronald Short, a connoisseur of the cinema living and working in Austin, TX. He eats, sleeps, and breathes film and filmmaking. He also happens to be my partner. When I read his post on Tumblr about Mad Max, and his words for his fellow men, I was excited to share it here. I loved the film myself and  was really excited to talk about it a ton with him. 

You can follow Ronald on Twitter or check out his production company, Short Pictures Independent on Facebook.

Mad Max: Fury Road is an action masterpiece. The practical stunts, effects, and story (the whole movie is a chase, an army of bad guys…er, War Boys relentlessly pursuing a small group of women, including their leader Furiosa (Charlize Theron) and our titular hero Max (Tom Hardy). Our protagonists are trying to escape the grasp of the nefarious Immortan Joe (Hugh Keays-Byrne) who will stop at nothing to get his “property” back) will often leave you gazing at the screen with your mouth agape in disbelief. Like I said on my social media after seeing it a second time, this movie is a masterclass in editing and structure. It’s one I will be watching a lot over the next however many years I have left on this rock to not only relive that enjoyment, but to study George Miller’s brushstrokes as a filmmaker and artist. It’s that damn good.

If this movie was purely its special effects and action sequences, it would still be pretty great, one that would stand shoulder to shoulder with some of the best action films out there. However, as I’m sure many of you probably know by now even if you haven’t seen the flick, it isn’t your run of the mill action film. This is a FEMINIST action film. And it’s time for the world to fuckin’ accept it and ENJOY it.

***IT’S A FREE FOR ALL IN TERMS OF SPOILERS FROM THIS POINT ON***

My very thorough and official reaction to Patricia Arquette's comments at the 87th annual Academy Awards

Why it seems like just last week that I was discussing White Feminism's (TM) latest fail. Oh wait.

The next chapter in the on-going saga that is exclusionary feminism has already been released! This time starring Patricia Arquette: 

Without further ado, here is my highly anticipated reaction, in chronological order:

[Image text: reaction gifs of Mila Kunis nodding, Lea Michele listening with a smile, then it fades and she looks around confused, followed by Oprah shaking her head and looking disgusted and a final one of Prince giving an angry glare over his shoulder and walking away.]

There's almost no way that you've arrived at this post and don't know what this is about, but just in case: Arquette made some comments about wage disparity at the Oscars on Sunday which might have seemed progressive, but were actually super White Feminism (TM.) The worst of what she said wasn't on stage. Later to the press she said.

So the truth is, even though we sort of feel like we have equal rights in America, right under the surface, there are huge issues that are applied that really do affect women. And it’s time for all the women in America and all the men that love women, and all the gay people, and all the people of color that we’ve all fought for to fight for us now.

Obviously, as the joke of the title of this post indicates, I don't have really anything substantive to add to the conversation. So many other people have thoroughly explained the issues here forward and backward. But with it being the big feminist topic du jour, I feel I would be remiss if I didn't just note how much I agree with the backlash against these statements. It's infuriating how so many of my fellow white feminists continuously fail to think about anything beyond their own position in life. When you have the power of a podium behind you like the Oscars stage and you want to say something very BIG, you had better think through what it is you're actually saying and wanting for the world before you open your mouth.

I mean, look, if we want to talk about wage inequality on a national stage, I am so up for that. But any conversation about it which focuses on (apparently) on straight, white women is inherently flawed and won't get us far:

[Image text: wage gap data broken our by race and gender with Asian men making the most and Latina women the least. More information and audio available at the source, NPR.]

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Just lean away, forever, please

You know what's really messed up?

Using White Feminism (TM) to bully other women.

I know this happens literally all the time every day in big and small ways, but I'll cut right to the chase on this one. I'm talking about the reaction to Jessica Williams saying she ins't ready to take on the job of hosting the Daily Show after Jon Stewart's departure.

If you're engaged in social justice on Tumblr (and other places, but that's my frame of reference), you were well aware of the many calls for Williams to take this soon-to-be-open gig. I was one of them! I agreed! Williams is awesome and hilarious and her filling that seat would be incredible.

BUT

Best/Worst of Golden Globes 2015

[Content note: rape]

So Golden Globes have come and gone. Since I've had something to say about it the past few years,  I figured I'd throw in my two cents again. I know pretty much everyone who writes about pop culture and/or celebrities and/or feminism will also do so...so I'm not going to get in depth or anything. I just want to note a few things.

Worst moments:

• Jeremy Renner making a disgusting joke about J. Lo's "globes" aka her breasts aka stfu Renner.
• The whole Margaret Cho/North Korea bit. And it being pretty much the only Asian representation last night.
• Fey and Poehler's Bill Cosby rape jokes. Disliked for the reasons listed at the link.
• Ricky Gervais saying  Quvenzhané Wallis' name wrong. I keep thinking about how she's a KID at these things and people do crap like that and ugh. No.
• Selma getting snubbed for all the major awards. Y'all...that film...is...seriously amazing. Ava DuVernay deserves everything in my mind.
• Billy Bob Thornton saying, "You get in trouble for saying anything these days" in his old white man southern draw. This went under the radar, I feel like. But all I could think was, "So you're definitely a bigot then?" But at least he stuck to his word and didn't say anything else and just took his ass off stage after a simple, "Thank you." Weird moment.

Best moments:

• Gina Rodriguez's acceptance speech for Latinas.  
• Common and John Legend's acceptance speech for black lives.  
• Joanne Froggatt's acceptance speech for rape survivors. 
• Matt Bomer's acceptance speech for those lost to AIDS. 
• Jill Soloway's acceptance speech for Leelah Alcorn and the trans community. 
• The joke about how damn accomplished Amal Clooney is. 
• The Huffington Post has a few more moments that were cool (not all of them.) But I did like Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda's joke about men not being funny and the comments from Julianne Moore, Amy Adams, and Patricia Arquette. 

Overall a very mixed bag. 

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A super important post about my evolving feelings re: one, Ms. Taylor Swift

I haven't been fond of Taylor Swift in the past (like both last year and the FAR past.) In fact, I believe my exact words about her went a little something like, "She's the worst."

But I have something to admit.

*Deep breath*

I don't hate her anymore. I'm not saying I like her...but ok, I kinda like her.

I could chalk this up to a "Swiftamine" situation, which is true, but also, there have been a few things I've seen here and there lately which have caught my eye and given her come credibility in my mind.

• She amended her identification as a feminist. And she's talking double standards and stuff now.
• She seems genuinely nice, at least from her recent "Swiftmas" video.
• Her more recent music seems to shake the girl-on-girl hate mentality. (I can't speak for the songs on 1989 which weren't released as singles since I haven't heard the whole album, so here's hoping this is true.)
• Her affinity for cats. This is not a legitimate point in her favor, unless you love cats as much as I do.
• This cover of TIME Magazine. (Click through that link for why it matters.)

I thought long and hard about even mentioning this because Swift, overall, is still FAR from perfect. And I'm still going to cringe at her...a lot, probably. But because one of my anti-TS posts recently got a little traction for some reason, I felt it was perhaps appropriate to issue at least a light amendment on my opinion of her to "actually, maybe not the worst, I guess."

Because if my feminism can't acknowledge someone's personal growth, then what is it even for?

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Rape Culture Watch: Shia LaBeouf Edition

[Content note: Rape culture]

As has been well circulated, Shia LaBeouf recently said during an interview with Dazed that he was raped during an infamous performance piece.

The following response has been disgusting as usual, with disbelief and shame, particularly from perennial asshat, Piers Morgan. Even some of the less insidious comments I've seen sickened me. On one comment string on Facebook, someone posited, "Of course men can be raped too--they have anuses." (As if this is the only way someone with a penis could be raped. Missing the point, hard, there.)

Any time someone comes forward with their story like this, and is inevitably shamed, mocked, and disbelieved. So I wonder (again and again and again) why rape apologists think someone would make this stuff up? What does someone stand to gain from make a "false accusation" except scorn and hatred?

Take the usual "high profile" rape case, which involves an accusation made against a famous man by a woman or many women. In this situation, rape apologists say that the woman is trying to get his money, or whatever misogynistic garbage they can dig up...which made me wonder: why do they think Shia LaBeouf who is, himself, a rich dude, would make this up?

Well if Morgan and his ilk are to be believed, the reason is attention. Cue head explosion. Rape apologists have a dismissal for every person, every story, every time.

All of this negative energy around victims' stories like this--the shame and disbelief-- only serve to do one thing: continue to make it less and less likely that victims feel comfortable speaking out.

And it's fucking bullshit.


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Rape Culture Watch: The Mindy Project Part 2

[Content note: Rape culture, vulgar language]

Sigh. I'm a glutton for punishment.

I should have learned long ago, and I said I would learn, that The Mindy Project is garbage. But I keep tuning in. And 75% of the time, I like the show for being mindless fun. That other 25% should have sent me packing by now. I feel like a really bad feminist.

Beautiful, Hilarious Aidy Bryant

[Content note: some discussion of fat shaming stereotypes and weight loss]

Something kinda awesome is quietly happening on SNL right now. Since Fall of 2012, Aidy Bryant has been a cast member. If you don't watch the show, here she is:

[Image text: Bryant standing at a formal event in a black and blue cocktail dress.]

Her addition to the line up immediately caught my attention. I was overjoyed for a lady cast member who is bigger than a size 10. I mean...I can easily think of many fat dudes in the show's history (John Belushi, Horatio Sans, Chris Farley, and currently Keenan Thomas.)

But big ladies? I can't think of any...have there been others besides Bryant?

So I was rooting for her, and she didn't disappoint. Many of her skits have been the highlight of my viewing experience lately. But there's another pitfall of ladies on SNL, which I will call the Melissa McCarthy effect--where they are too often written into skits as kinda disgusting weirdos frequently obsessed with food. (That's not to say I don't love McCarthy's times hosting the show because she's hilarious, but the content does make me kinda sad.)

But this isn't happening with Bryant, and that's the quiet amazing thing that I'm watching. To my observation, Bryant is being used in a body neutral way. Sometimes she plays someone absurd, but other times she plays someone who is sexy, just like any of the other ladies. (I wish this didn't feel revolutionary to me, but it does.) And because she's hilarious and kills it nearly every time, she keeps getting more and more prominent roles.

I first got an inkling of this last year during the music video skit "(Do It On My) Twin Bed." In it the female cast mates are talking about bringing home their boyfriends to their parents house for the holidays and the weirdness of having sex in their childhood bedrooms. Bryant is there with the more conventionally attractive cast mates and it's no big deal. Because...it's actually not, ya know? Us fat ladies actually DO have healthy sex lives too.

This theme continued during this season's opener, which featured Bryant in a skit about a sexual medication called "Cialis Turnt." Again, the joke here isn't Bryant herself, but rather the ridiculousness of the content. I'm sure other fat ladies like myself know exactly why I find this so interesting. For us to not be caricatured as the hypersexual, but intended-to-be-seen-as-repulsive figure is rare.

The best thing about Bryant's role in the season opener, is that she was cast in a skit about flirting opposite Chris Pratt, who is widely considered as a Hottie McHotterson lately (due to his extreme weight loss...if you ask me he was just as attractive before, but that's a blog post for another day.) And again, it's no small thing that the joke of the skit is not that SHE is flirting with HIM, but HOW they are both flirting. And if anything, her "big fat ass" isn't a point of shame, but pride: thanks, Nicki Minaj! (And it's worth nothing that Bryant has also appeared in another skit last year which at least partially embraces the term "fat" as a self-descriptor. On national television. Who else does that?)

I just love it. I mean, I'm not saying I love the content of all of these skits...but I do love her place in them.

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Bubbles are Great...Until You Leave Them

[Content note: rape culture, pedophilia]

As mentioned, last weekend, I had a fantastic trip to Chicago. It was the best time, full of laughter and love. Of course, venturing into a new city and hanging out with all kinds of folks also means that I wasn't in my safe little feminist bubble, and I sometimes forget that. My happy little wonderful bubble...that lulls me into a false sense of how the world really is.

I know all too well that assholes are out there, but I don't usually have to spend time around them, yanno? Sometimes they feel as relevant to my actual daily life as a yeti.

But I had a situation this weekend that sent me flying back into the reality of what the world is. At karaoke one evening, I was sitting next to a guy I've been tangentially aware of but don't really know. Some of the other people it the room put on an R. Kelly song, and because I can't let that stuff go unaddressed, I said, "Ah yes, a child rapist everyone. You're listening to a child rapist." Random dude next to me says...totally seriously...

"At least he's not like Michael Jackson and doesn't rape little boys."

A piece of my soul died. Yes, that's right...this guy thinks that the rape of little girls isn't as bad as the rape of boys. Apparently, girl lives aren't worth as much as boy's. (In case this needs to be clarified, it's pretty clear he's coming from a homophobic, misogynistic place. Child rape is child rape and it's all horrific.) So I said that to him, totally stone faced, "Child rape is child rape" giving him a moment to realize his fuck up but he didn't back down or THINK about what he said at all.

My skin's still crawling thinking about this. What a turd. What a dickwad. What a disgusting shit stain.

Yep...stuff's much nicer inside my happy little bubble. But out there, the rape culture is, of course, alive and well.

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Today in victim blaming

[Content note: abuse, violence, victim blaming, sexual assault, rape culture]

After a lovely long weekend away in Chicago (and specifically being in a bubble) I've been catching up on the news. And FANTASTIC! Misogyny is live and well. /Sarcasm

I don't know a damn thing about sports, but I do know that people have been watching a video of Ray Rice assaulting his then-girlfriend-now-wife, Janay Palmer, (btw, don't). Some folks have been all, "Why would she marry him after that?!" And when her defense of him on Instagram was shared on Facebook, I saw quite a few people calling her "dumb" and "crazy."

Sometimes only a gif can adequately express frustration:

Thankfully, Beverly Gooden took to Twitter and started #WhyIStayed which demonstrated the incredibly complex and dangerous situation that victims of domestic violence face every day.

If you don't understand this topic...if you've never been abused or studied toxic relationship dynamics...the solution is to keep your opinions to yourself and go READ from people who do. And let me make this perfectly clear and as blunt as possible...if you hear a story like Palmer Rice's and you EVER feel the need to say something like 1) Why didn't she just leave? 2) Why did she marry him? 3) What did she expect? ...I ask that you kindly a) shut up and b) fuck off forever. That's really all I can say about that.


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We shouldn't need to be strong

[Content note: fat shaming]

I love Gabourey Sidibe. She's a great actress. She's one of the very few visible feisty fat ladies in Hollywood. And she always seems so hilarious and cool.

But there's a quote from a recent speech she made to the Ms. Foundation that's been going around and bugging me. Not because of what Sidibe said about herself or her experience, but because of its reflection of our society.

[Image text: Sidibe pictured with her quote, "If they hadn't told me I was ugly, I never would have searched for my beauty. And if they hadn't tried to break me down, I wouldn't know I'm unbreakable."]

More on Louis CK and Fat Women

The days following Louis CK's latest episode of Louie, me (and everyone) writing about it, has been really interesting. It's pretty clear that there is no ONE universal reaction to this episode of the show. While fat ladies (like myself) have been excited about it, others have been much more critical.

In one interaction with another fat positive blogger, I heard the argument that he's getting all the credit for saying what fat ladies have been saying forever. Another outspoken critic is Melissa McEwan of Shakesville, who wrote a piece which has been sent to me by many people now.

Louis CK takes on fatphobia X sexism

Last night, I sat semi-aghast as the latest episode of Louis CK's Louie took on a big (pun totally intentded) topic: being a fat lady in a sexist and fatphobic society.

As I told Ronald at the time, the scene in which a new character, Vanessa (Sarah Baker), tells Louie (CK) what it's like to walk in her shoes, was the realest 10 minutes of TV I've seen in a loooooong time. If you haven't seen it, check it out here:



The scene (and the episode in general) were remarkable for a number of reasons. The one that stood out to me the most was how CK, who writes every episode, isn't just calling out how society treats fat women, he's actually calling out himself and men like him. I mean, Louie has frequently fallen into the "schlubby guy, hot girl" trope in the past. (Unless, as Vanessa points out, the schlubby guy wants a lay. She calls bullshit on guys who fuck fat girls but won't date them. Yet again, women can be fetishized and objectified, but heaven forbid they want to be treated like humans.)

When did we lose our understanding of "satire?"

When you run a public shaming blog, you run into all types of bigots and trolls. Perhaps the most boring to me are the ones who try to claim that everything is a joke. The increasingly more popular take on this is "it's satire therefore it is OK and you shouldn't be offended."

Rape Culture Watch: SNL

[Content note: Sexual assault "joke," discussion of rape culture]

This past weekend's episode of SNL sure had a lot of cringe worthy moments. And not just the kind that come from really awkward, unfunny, weird crap. Also the kind that come from extended "jokes" about sexual assault.

Sigh.

The skit in question featured host Seth Rogen at an engagement party where his awkward hilly billy cousin, played by Cecily Strong, is revealing all kinds of embarrassing facts about his past. At first it appears that he did something sexual with a guy, a blow job I think (oh how embarrassing. *Eye roll.*) But then it turns out that this incident occurred when the other guy was sleeping and he is totally unaware it ever happened.

Cue me trying to stifle a scream of sheer exasperation.

Look, I know I'm not supposed to go to SNL for my social justice-y laughs, but given some of the slightly more progressive stuff they've done recently, I was pretty disappointed that they wrote something that gross. How in the world did they think it would be super-awesome to produce a skit where the entire punch line rests on a violation of consent? (And add to that the fact that they coupled the sexual assault with homosexuality, as if those things are equally deserving of shame...what?!)

If you're someone who hasn't thought about rape culture in detail before, it could be easy to dismiss this type of skit as "harmless" but I'd like to remind everyone that each of these "small" depictions of rape-as-a-joke add up to the cultural mockery of survivors and the normalization of rape. This results in a society where defense attorneys argue that if a semi-unconscious person doesn't "affirmatively say no" it's not rape. (Just typing that out makes my skin crawl.)

This shit is real life. So you'll have to excuse me if I don't find it funny. And hey, SNL, I'd take more weirdo French dance skits over this crap, any day. That's how low my bar is right now.

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Rape Culture Realities

[Content note: discussions of rape culture, child sexual abuse]

As I'm sure anyone remotely aware of feminism, rape culture, or film already knows, there's a shit storm going down with the publication of Dylan Farrow's open letter about Woody Allen's sexual abuse of her as a child and his response (which doesn't get a link from me, because fuck that asshole.)