What I'm Watching: Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

[Content note: mention of abortion; spoilers for Season 2 of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend and Season

Ahhhhhh...winter break. AKA three weeks of doing whatever the hell I want, which today means making my hair redder and my nails green. I'm walking Christmas decor! The holidays, what a beautiful time. It also means I have some time to binge watch some TV, which is one of my all time favorite bumming around activities.

I've recently gotten into Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. (Ableist name aside...) I am pretty pleased with what I'm seeing!

I'll admit it took me some time to get into it. I wasn't at all a fan of the cheesy musical style. In fact, I actually watched the first two episodes and then quit it for a few weeks, having filed it under M for Meh. But needing something to watch again, I circled back to it and finally, eventually "got it." (Like, the cheese is its thang, they lean into it.)

This Is Us............Hmmm

I just went through a roller coaster of emotions so I'm gonna process it all right here.

1) I saw Parenthood post on the FB page that a new show coming to NBC, This Is Us, is being called the next Parenthood. I LOVED PARENTHOOD, so naturally I was intrigued.

Emotion meter: cautiously optimistic

2) The synopsis is boring on Wikipedia ("The series tells the story of people born on the same day") so I check out the show's NBC page and see this picture:

OMG OMG IS THAT A FAT WOMAN CHARACTER PARTNERED WITH A STEREOTYPICALLY ATTRACTIVE DUDE!?! ARE THEY JUST LIVING A NORMAL, LOVING LIFE OF SOME SORT? THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!!!

Emotion meter: on cloud 9.

3) I read this snippet about the show and watched this clip:

"Kate (Chrissy Metz), who’s struggling with a weight problem; her brother Kevin (Justin Hartley), a TV star who’s fed up with his brainless sitcom"

It was a drill. It was only a drill.

Emotion meter: devastated.

4) I try to convince myself, "maybe they will make this character so much more than it seems from those snippets above??"

Emotion meter: hopeful but expecting a giant let down.

That's where I am now. I have no idea how this will all come to fruition, but I'm going to check out This Is Us in the fall for the comparisons to Parenthood  alone. That said, I only have so much of a tolerance for "fat people's lives are tragic and if only they would lose weight, then they'll be awesome" story lines. I'll bail if there isn't something more interesting going on for this character.

I mean, maybe the creators of This Is Us are drawing on this trope so they can pull in mainstream audiences but then, ultimately, subvert it?

Look at me being so positive.

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Just lean away, forever, please

You know what's really messed up?

Using White Feminism (TM) to bully other women.

I know this happens literally all the time every day in big and small ways, but I'll cut right to the chase on this one. I'm talking about the reaction to Jessica Williams saying she ins't ready to take on the job of hosting the Daily Show after Jon Stewart's departure.

If you're engaged in social justice on Tumblr (and other places, but that's my frame of reference), you were well aware of the many calls for Williams to take this soon-to-be-open gig. I was one of them! I agreed! Williams is awesome and hilarious and her filling that seat would be incredible.

BUT

Super Bowl 2015

[Content note: cissexism, death]

I'm a slacker. While in years past, I have dedicated a LOT of time and attention to Super Bowl ads, I barely even watched this year. In fact, for the first quarter I was actually out on a walk and the second quarter I was straightening up around my house. I did catch the Katy Perry halftime show (shrug) and a few ads, however.

I love the Always "Like A Girl" ad (although I had seen it before.)



I'M NOT CRYING, YOU'RE CRYING.

It's pretty damn cool this would air during the Super Bowl, which historically has skewed to being out right hostile to women.

While I do love the overall message of this ad, I know it's an AD and it has to be remembered within that context. As Jilliam Berman wrote at the HuffPo, "The ad may be the first time a [menstrual] care product was advertised during the Super Bowl and is a prominent example of how companies trying to woo women customers are shifting advertising tactics...The idea for the touchy-feely ad campaign came from a common business exercise: analyzing consumer research."

So at the end of the day, it's trying to sell us something. I do support advertisements moving toward this empowering perspective, but we can't ever forget their main motive.

I also caught the pretty horrific "your kid could be DEAD, DEAD I SAY!!!!" spot from Nationwide.




I have a feeling someone was fired over this.

I mean, if their goal was to stir controversy and discussion, they did, but I'm not sure the overwhelming negative response was worth it. It's a pretty classic case study in how treading the line of "in poor taste" can  back fire on you.

Otherwise, I didn't really catch any ads that stuck with me. Was there something horribly offensive that I missed?

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Best/Worst of Golden Globes 2015

[Content note: rape]

So Golden Globes have come and gone. Since I've had something to say about it the past few years,  I figured I'd throw in my two cents again. I know pretty much everyone who writes about pop culture and/or celebrities and/or feminism will also do so...so I'm not going to get in depth or anything. I just want to note a few things.

Worst moments:

• Jeremy Renner making a disgusting joke about J. Lo's "globes" aka her breasts aka stfu Renner.
• The whole Margaret Cho/North Korea bit. And it being pretty much the only Asian representation last night.
• Fey and Poehler's Bill Cosby rape jokes. Disliked for the reasons listed at the link.
• Ricky Gervais saying  Quvenzhané Wallis' name wrong. I keep thinking about how she's a KID at these things and people do crap like that and ugh. No.
• Selma getting snubbed for all the major awards. Y'all...that film...is...seriously amazing. Ava DuVernay deserves everything in my mind.
• Billy Bob Thornton saying, "You get in trouble for saying anything these days" in his old white man southern draw. This went under the radar, I feel like. But all I could think was, "So you're definitely a bigot then?" But at least he stuck to his word and didn't say anything else and just took his ass off stage after a simple, "Thank you." Weird moment.

Best moments:

• Gina Rodriguez's acceptance speech for Latinas.  
• Common and John Legend's acceptance speech for black lives.  
• Joanne Froggatt's acceptance speech for rape survivors. 
• Matt Bomer's acceptance speech for those lost to AIDS. 
• Jill Soloway's acceptance speech for Leelah Alcorn and the trans community. 
• The joke about how damn accomplished Amal Clooney is. 
• The Huffington Post has a few more moments that were cool (not all of them.) But I did like Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda's joke about men not being funny and the comments from Julianne Moore, Amy Adams, and Patricia Arquette. 

Overall a very mixed bag. 

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My body is not a costume

[Content note: fat shaming, fatphobia, weight loss]

I wasn't surprised to see a few "fat suit" costumes come across my newsfeed Friday night and Saturday morning on Facebook.

No, not surprised. Disgusted. Embarrassed. Outraged. Yes, all of those, but not surprised.

There's a disturbingly long history of fat suit usage in popular culture and our media. The trend of these artifacts is to mock, shame, humiliate, and belittle actual fat people. But even the more seemingly positive "I'm just trying to experience life like you for a day" examples convey the message that thin people sensationally experiencing the just so awful lives of fat people is more interesting than listening to ACTUAL fat folks.

One costume I saw in particular rubbed me the wrong way. It looked like this (but this particular image was pulled from Google.)

[Image text: two people posing in fat suits and Biggest Loser contestant shirts.]

The Biggest Loser is one of the most heinous examples of outright fat hatred that I can think of...what they put their contestants through is dehumanizing and outright dangerous. So for some thin folks to not only don a fat body for funsies--but one that is so visibly abused and degraded by that crap show week after week...well it just pisses me the fuck off.

Listen very carefully: My body is not something you get to put on for fun and take off again, retreating into your ignorant bliss of thin privilege. My body is not to be worn for mockery. You don't get to do that. My body is not to be your object of shock! It is not to be disparaged. It's taken me YEARS to feel comfortable and strong enough to say that so publicly...to embrace myself...to feel at peace and you don't get to take that away.

My body is not your fucking costume--it's my actual existence. When will people start learning that other folks identities are NOT to be worn?

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Rape Culture Watch: The Mindy Project Part 2

[Content note: Rape culture, vulgar language]

Sigh. I'm a glutton for punishment.

I should have learned long ago, and I said I would learn, that The Mindy Project is garbage. But I keep tuning in. And 75% of the time, I like the show for being mindless fun. That other 25% should have sent me packing by now. I feel like a really bad feminist.

Beautiful, Hilarious Aidy Bryant

[Content note: some discussion of fat shaming stereotypes and weight loss]

Something kinda awesome is quietly happening on SNL right now. Since Fall of 2012, Aidy Bryant has been a cast member. If you don't watch the show, here she is:

[Image text: Bryant standing at a formal event in a black and blue cocktail dress.]

Her addition to the line up immediately caught my attention. I was overjoyed for a lady cast member who is bigger than a size 10. I mean...I can easily think of many fat dudes in the show's history (John Belushi, Horatio Sans, Chris Farley, and currently Keenan Thomas.)

But big ladies? I can't think of any...have there been others besides Bryant?

So I was rooting for her, and she didn't disappoint. Many of her skits have been the highlight of my viewing experience lately. But there's another pitfall of ladies on SNL, which I will call the Melissa McCarthy effect--where they are too often written into skits as kinda disgusting weirdos frequently obsessed with food. (That's not to say I don't love McCarthy's times hosting the show because she's hilarious, but the content does make me kinda sad.)

But this isn't happening with Bryant, and that's the quiet amazing thing that I'm watching. To my observation, Bryant is being used in a body neutral way. Sometimes she plays someone absurd, but other times she plays someone who is sexy, just like any of the other ladies. (I wish this didn't feel revolutionary to me, but it does.) And because she's hilarious and kills it nearly every time, she keeps getting more and more prominent roles.

I first got an inkling of this last year during the music video skit "(Do It On My) Twin Bed." In it the female cast mates are talking about bringing home their boyfriends to their parents house for the holidays and the weirdness of having sex in their childhood bedrooms. Bryant is there with the more conventionally attractive cast mates and it's no big deal. Because...it's actually not, ya know? Us fat ladies actually DO have healthy sex lives too.

This theme continued during this season's opener, which featured Bryant in a skit about a sexual medication called "Cialis Turnt." Again, the joke here isn't Bryant herself, but rather the ridiculousness of the content. I'm sure other fat ladies like myself know exactly why I find this so interesting. For us to not be caricatured as the hypersexual, but intended-to-be-seen-as-repulsive figure is rare.

The best thing about Bryant's role in the season opener, is that she was cast in a skit about flirting opposite Chris Pratt, who is widely considered as a Hottie McHotterson lately (due to his extreme weight loss...if you ask me he was just as attractive before, but that's a blog post for another day.) And again, it's no small thing that the joke of the skit is not that SHE is flirting with HIM, but HOW they are both flirting. And if anything, her "big fat ass" isn't a point of shame, but pride: thanks, Nicki Minaj! (And it's worth nothing that Bryant has also appeared in another skit last year which at least partially embraces the term "fat" as a self-descriptor. On national television. Who else does that?)

I just love it. I mean, I'm not saying I love the content of all of these skits...but I do love her place in them.

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More on Louis CK and Fat Women

The days following Louis CK's latest episode of Louie, me (and everyone) writing about it, has been really interesting. It's pretty clear that there is no ONE universal reaction to this episode of the show. While fat ladies (like myself) have been excited about it, others have been much more critical.

In one interaction with another fat positive blogger, I heard the argument that he's getting all the credit for saying what fat ladies have been saying forever. Another outspoken critic is Melissa McEwan of Shakesville, who wrote a piece which has been sent to me by many people now.

Louis CK takes on fatphobia X sexism

Last night, I sat semi-aghast as the latest episode of Louis CK's Louie took on a big (pun totally intentded) topic: being a fat lady in a sexist and fatphobic society.

As I told Ronald at the time, the scene in which a new character, Vanessa (Sarah Baker), tells Louie (CK) what it's like to walk in her shoes, was the realest 10 minutes of TV I've seen in a loooooong time. If you haven't seen it, check it out here:



The scene (and the episode in general) were remarkable for a number of reasons. The one that stood out to me the most was how CK, who writes every episode, isn't just calling out how society treats fat women, he's actually calling out himself and men like him. I mean, Louie has frequently fallen into the "schlubby guy, hot girl" trope in the past. (Unless, as Vanessa points out, the schlubby guy wants a lay. She calls bullshit on guys who fuck fat girls but won't date them. Yet again, women can be fetishized and objectified, but heaven forbid they want to be treated like humans.)

Faking It...Emphasis on the FAKE

So I caught MTV's new scripted show, Faking It. I was watching Awkward (yes, I still watch it even though it has devolved some since I wrote about it...) and the lead-in caught my attention because it's supposed to take place in Austin (it's the most LA looking Austin I've ever seen, but I digress.)

Here's the premise, from the Wikipedia page:

After numerous attempts of trying to be popular two best friends decide to come out as lesbians, which launches them to instant celebrity status. Seduced by their newfound fame, Karma and Amy decide to keep up their romantic ruse.

Hm. Ok.

Let me just dig in on a few immediate reactions I had to what I saw...

Rape Culture Watch: SNL

[Content note: Sexual assault "joke," discussion of rape culture]

This past weekend's episode of SNL sure had a lot of cringe worthy moments. And not just the kind that come from really awkward, unfunny, weird crap. Also the kind that come from extended "jokes" about sexual assault.

Sigh.

The skit in question featured host Seth Rogen at an engagement party where his awkward hilly billy cousin, played by Cecily Strong, is revealing all kinds of embarrassing facts about his past. At first it appears that he did something sexual with a guy, a blow job I think (oh how embarrassing. *Eye roll.*) But then it turns out that this incident occurred when the other guy was sleeping and he is totally unaware it ever happened.

Cue me trying to stifle a scream of sheer exasperation.

Look, I know I'm not supposed to go to SNL for my social justice-y laughs, but given some of the slightly more progressive stuff they've done recently, I was pretty disappointed that they wrote something that gross. How in the world did they think it would be super-awesome to produce a skit where the entire punch line rests on a violation of consent? (And add to that the fact that they coupled the sexual assault with homosexuality, as if those things are equally deserving of shame...what?!)

If you're someone who hasn't thought about rape culture in detail before, it could be easy to dismiss this type of skit as "harmless" but I'd like to remind everyone that each of these "small" depictions of rape-as-a-joke add up to the cultural mockery of survivors and the normalization of rape. This results in a society where defense attorneys argue that if a semi-unconscious person doesn't "affirmatively say no" it's not rape. (Just typing that out makes my skin crawl.)

This shit is real life. So you'll have to excuse me if I don't find it funny. And hey, SNL, I'd take more weirdo French dance skits over this crap, any day. That's how low my bar is right now.

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Happy Galentine's Day!

[Image text "Happy Galentine's Day, I'm celebrating you, you beautiful tropical fish." From the Smart Girls Facebook page.]

One of the best things that Parks & Recreation ever did was give us Galentine's Day.

If you're not familiar (first of all, start watching this show!) Galentine's Day is one of Leslie Knope's many invented holidays. This one's all about celebrating female friendships and appreciating your lady friends for who they are.

In a world in where girls and women are pushed into seeing each other as competitors for male attention and where internalized misogyny is so strong that women routinely say things like, "This is why I can't have female friends" we need more initiatives like Galentine's Day.

It reminds us that there is so much beauty and comfort to be found in our female friendships.

So when I logged on Facebook this morning and already saw dozens of my friends sharing Galentine's messages I was ecstatic. This thing is really taking off.

Happy Galentine's Day!



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Super Bowl 2014 Commercial Watch. With Tweets! And Gifs!

Let the annual tradition continue!

I'm going to do things a little different this year. Instead of waiting until the night is long over, I'm going to semi-live blog this thing. (Only semi, because I'm not going to post it as I go, I'll wait until the end.) But it will be much more stream of conscious style than usual. Plus, I'm much more likely to remember who the companies involved if I just write it all up now instead of trying to remember tomorrow.

Let me make sure I put this out there: I hate football. I really, truly do. It's just not my thing. But the Super Bowl is such a spectacle and its ads are a huge artifact of pop culture and are pretty influential and iconic, so I have to do this, ya know? Companies spend so much on their ads tonight and try to have the best one, so let's see what they have.

If the stream of consciousness thing ain't for you, I'm going to put my TL;DR comments above the cut. If you would actually like to see where my brain went during the game, then the stuff under the cut is made for you!

TL;DR: Overall, things weren't the worst this year. If anything I was absolutely underwhelmed. BUT there were still some distinct disappointments. VW's "Wings" ad included both a penis size and sexual harassment joke while totally ignoring women as engineers. How did at least one person in the production of that not say, "Dude, you gotta have a woman engineer get her wings." Axe brought in some racism and sexism with their "Peace: Make Love Not War" spot, which is nothing surprising for their brand. On the other hand, Goldiblox is awesome but I knew that. Coke actually did something interesting. And my old nemesis GoDaddy had something very different to offer, but no one believes they aren't the same old jerks.

Mindy Project: On To Fat Shaming Now

[Content note: fat shaming, body shaming, rape "jokes"]

Ya know...The Mindy Project is probably the most troubling show I watch. (There are certainly worse shows out there, I just don't watch them.) The last time I bemoaned it, I was having some major issues with a rape plot line involving James Franco's character.

This time it's some hardcore body shaming.

Excited for Sasheer Zamata

[Content note: street harassment, sexual harassment]

So SNL has announced they are adding the first black woman cast member in 6 years, and she's...Sasheer Zamata!

I'm really, really excited about her joining. First of all, she's originally from Indianapolis, like me. So automatic points for being a Hoosier. Secondly, I first saw her hilarity in this "storytime" video from last summer, which she wrote and stars in:



That's some feminist humor right there--her depicted difference between how she viewed the incident and the guy probably viewed it, is insightful and hilarious. And her point, that a flasher is actually "kind of respectful" given how other men behave, is a great punch at our misogynistic culture and the difficulties of dating as a straight, single woman.

While I'm psyched about Zamata's casting, it's total bullshit how the search for a new black woman cast member came about (Keenan Thompson's comments and incredible underrepresentation of black women on the show.) And the real test is yet to be seen, specifically, SNL and its writers still have the potential to grossly misuse her in racist and misogynistic ways. But I'm going to remain cautiously optimistic and will definitely be tuning in for her debut on the 18th.

Overall, I think that the women of SNL right now are the ones bringing the best laughs, anyway (I love Aidy Bryant in particular.) Zamata absolutely has the talent to add to that!

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Leggero's SpaghettiO's "Controversy" Highlights Actually Controversial Subject Matter

[Image text: Carson Daly and Natasha Leggero on NYE.]

[Content note: violence, rape culture, misogyny, gendered slurs]

I hadn't heard a peep about this until a friend posted a link on Facebook, but apparently comedian Natasha Leggero made some comments about Pearl Harbor survivors that really pissed off team misogyny on New Year's Eve.

According to the Daily Mail (gag):

Checking in on The Walking Dead

[Content note: mentions of the sexual assault of a character, spoilers for AMC's The Walking Dead, up through the episode on 11/10/13.]

As I've said before, I'm not impressed with the depiction of women in The Walking Dead. But since I wrote that piece two years ago, and I'm still watching the damn thing, I thought I'd check in on what has happened more recently.

Good lord, I hope the fan boys don't come at me for this one like they did my piece about Breaking Bad this past summer...because as I tried to explain then (in vain) you can like something and still critique it/demand better. So don't jump down my throat for thinking critically about something just because you love it.

I'm Enjoying Super Fun Night

[Image text: Rebel Wilson in a
promo photo for Super Fun Night]

[Content note: body talk, mild spoilers for the show]

I like Rebel Wilson. I think she's hilarious and strange and hilariously strange in all the right ways. I loved her (even if she creeped me out) in Bridesmaids. I loved her in Bachlorette (even if the movie over all disappointed me,) I love her in interviews, and I loved her character in the Pitch Perfect trailer (even though I never actually saw the damn movie yet, whoops.)

So when I heard she had a show coming out this fall, I was pretty excited. I'm four episodes in and so far I haven't been disappointed.

Let me start with some things that I love about the show...

Sometimes I Feel Really Bad for Catfish

[Content note: light mentions of thin, cis, and straight privilege]

[Image text: promotional photo of Nev Schulman and his co-star/friend Max Joseph]

When I went to a movie theater in 2010 to see the movie Catfish, I thought I was seeing a creepy or horror-ish flick. I was epically disappointed when what I actually saw was the story of a guy, Nev Schulman, meeting a girl he fell in love with online and she turns out to be nothing like depicted. If I hadn't somehow misunderstood what I was going to see due to suspect marketing, I might have actually liked the thing. I know this because now that Schulman has his own show by the same name, where he helps people find out if they're being catfished, I am fascinated...

That is, until it also gets really sad.